Why why whyyyyy Delilah

A round-up of stuff which has happened so far:

1. Had wicked never-ending conversations with Mildred’s wonderful 3 year old daughter who responds to everything with why? Example:

Kid: [Pointing] What’s that?
Amnesiac: A belly button ring.
Kid: Why?
Amnesiac: I got it cos I like it.
Kid: Why?
Amnesiac: Cos it’s blue.
Kid: Why?
Amnesiac: Cos I like blue.
Kid: Why?
Etc.

These conversations have the potential to – but usually don’t – end in exciting existentialist conclusions. Two hours later.

2. Had eyebrows threaded by a woman who, judging by the pain, was using a pickaxe. She commented on my lack of swearing, screams or any other expression of agony. I didn’t possess sufficient Arabic vocabulary to explain to her that I had in fact got into shock.

3. Acquired and I hope lost a stalker.

4. Got duped into visiting the extravagantly-named Blue Hole, which is in fact just a bit of sea. The trip was made worthwhile however by this exchange at the checkpoint which leads to the Blue Hole:

The Pig: Hello. Is this the correct direction for the Blue Hole?
Checkpoint officer: Yes.
The Pig: Thanks.
Checkpoint officer: Where are you going?

5. Went with friend Sharshar to a martial arts studio to pursue my secret ambition of becoming a professional kickboxer. Sharshar also nurses a desire to be a ninja. We were both delighted to be taken into the Sensu/manager’s office which was so dimly lit it felt like we had walked into a mine, and whose red lighting gave it a brothel-type effect. It had all the kitsch of a Quentin Tarantino film, Sensu guy sitting bald and buff behind his desk which (I could just about make out) displayed a selection of ‘self-discovery through sword fighting’ type publications. The effect was only marred by Sharshar being forced to lower his not inconsiderable mass into a beanbag (mysteriously there was only one chair and yet three beanbags), and audibly suppressing laughter and ninja noises.

6. Made outrageously half-hearted attempts to find a job, while telling myself that some wowzers blazers human rights gig will fortuitously materialise in a poof out of thin air/Erin Brockovich style-ee.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Why why whyyyyy Delilah

  1. Anonymous says:

    Amne,

    You should send a copy of your cv to Ford Foundation’s Cairo Office, they hire consultants on a regular basis…I’ll keep an eye out as well.

  2. Amnesiac says:

    Thanks a lot Jester, Ford was on my list when I eventually get round to it. Do let me know if you hear of anything…

  3. Anonymous says:

    Hey Amne, I think I just lost my comment because we were both writing in at the same time!

    As I was saying, before you interrupted me : ) I stumbled across this position working for a new Refugee Rights initiative. Dunno if this means anything to you but Barbara Harrlebond is the chair. I should know more on Sat. interested?

  4. Amnesiac says:

    Hehe yes something weird happened this end too.
    Refugee law is not a particular interest of mine, but I would nonetheless like to know more – cheers mate.

  5. Anonymous says:

    Ok, it’s actually not about refugee law at all, the initiative aims to engage refugee communities and Egyptians by working directly with NGOs, assist them in conceptualizing projects and fundraising. If still interested email me and I’ll send you more details. (cairojester@gmail.com)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>