Monthly Archives: April 2007

Airport reading ban

On Friday night someone told me that the last book he’d read was ‘the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.’ If I hear ‘the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’ referred to just once more I will personally hunt down … Continue reading

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She freed a carload of caftans*

In a workshop today a man’s mobile rang, filling the room with the loudest, most cacophonous, aural riot of a ringtone you could ever imagine. The man was wearing a bottle green blazer, stripy shirt and was working the taxi … Continue reading

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A7aly*

While I was sitting in the deserted office today talking on the phone, a small boy of a variety Charles Dickens would have described as a street urchin – such was his angelic poverty – suddenly materialised in the doorway. … Continue reading

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Because last time I used 123.greetings for Mother’s Day the card included surprise porn pop-ups

Happy birthday Dad Keep on heading those invisible footballs

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A word with the headmaster

“Oh Amnesiac! You’re so witty and I’m newly divorced!” Any excuse to publish Hany’s picture The doctor vs. gardener saga took a new twist on Thursday when the very understanding boss called me in to his office for part two … Continue reading

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Cairo Rhapsody

Cairo undergoes a character transformation in the mercurial spring weather, cautiously emerging from its winter cave only to be pummelled by sudden and intense attacks of wind, sand and downpours, during which the collective gasp of its inhabitants – human, … Continue reading

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Tante Amnesiac

Cousin Mildred has engaged the services of one Captain Mohamed to equip three year-old daughter Elvis and her friends with the essential life skills of karate, chess and Qu’ran. He is an excellent pedagogue, managing to maintain the elusive equilibrium … Continue reading

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People of Egypt

…the Stand Up Cairo auditions are tomorrow. Funny people please come. Unfunny people please tell your funny friends to come. Note that these are closed auditions i.e. no audience. The rules:Individual acts onlyPerformances shouldn’t exceed 5 minutesOnly Arabic and English … Continue reading

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Love lift me up where I belong

Today I danced with a man over 300 feet above my head, which gives new meaning to the term flirting from a distance. The day had started badly however when, looking at the internet even before I got out of … Continue reading

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Art with a heart

In the extended family of Cairo’s districts, Mohandiseen is the glamorous high-rolling cousin who pretends that her illegitimate children do not exist: cross certain invisible dividing lines and giant concrete skyscrapers, sprawling neon highways and estival Arab tourists disappear suddenly … Continue reading

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