Mid-East suffers rare cold snap/BEELZEBUB BUSH’S DEMONIC PRESENCE ANGERS THE WEATHER GODS

From the BBC:

There have been a number of deaths and considerable damage to crops in the Middle East as temperatures in the region have fallen to exceptional lows.

Local reports say that 10 people died in Saudi Arabia after snowfalls.

In Syria, temperatures have dropped to minus 16 degrees Celsius. There has been widespread damage to crops in Syria, Jordan and Israel.

There has also been snow in the Iraqi capital Baghdad for the first time in living memory.

The Middle East is a region used to extremes of temperature – but not ones like these. YES COS THE EXTREMES ARE WEARING STETSONS.

Kuwaiti meteorologists are eagerly watching thermometers to see if the previous low recorded in the open desert, minus four degrees Celsius in 1964, could be broken in the coming days.
Some in the Jordanian government are worried that food prices may increase, giving inflation another unwelcome bump.

But reports from Israel suggest the weather may not be bad news for everyone. PROOF AS IF ANY WAS NEEDED OF HIS SELECTIVE AND DIABOLICAL POWERS.

Some farmers are suffering, but there has been a jump in the sale of heaters and warm clothes, with retailers saying the demand for some goods has tripled.

This cold snap has been caused by a weather system that began in Siberia. HE MEANS TEXAS.

But meteorologists in the region cannot agree whether it is the result of climate change; the director of Baghdad’s Meteorology Department reportedly said it could be, his counterpart in Amman disagrees. AND A NON-SPECIALIST IN DOKKI WHO HAS LOST FEELING IN HER HANDS EVEN WHEN INSIDE THE HOUSE SAYS THAT SHE CAN STILL SMELL THE SULPHUR. EVEN THROUGH THE ICICLES FORMED IN HER NOSTRILS.

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3 Responses to Mid-East suffers rare cold snap/BEELZEBUB BUSH’S DEMONIC PRESENCE ANGERS THE WEATHER GODS

  1. fully_polynomial says:

    this has to be genetic or something. you grew up in a city that arguably has the worst weather in the world, and mild egyptian winters still do this to you?

  2. Forsoothsayer says:

    i’m the same. both of us have vacated perfectly good countries in significant part because we hate the cold. i feel u, dude. i nearly went into cardiac arrest the other day when my bare foot touched the bathroom floor.

  3. Amnesiac says:

    This is no mild winter! After you left and that cowboy-booted moron arrived the temperature plummeted by several thousand degrees.

    It can’t be genetic because my mother would happily bathe naked in snow and has an extreme aversion to the heat.

    I cannot recall my father ever adopting any clear stance on extremes of weather. I think this is reflected in his year-round sporting of a fanella, come what may.

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