Harrying the marrying

Amnesiac is in a taxi with associates on the October Bridge on a balmy, breezy night.

The moustachioed, bawdy taxi driver slows down as he passes a wedding in order to inspect the couple who are standing against the bridge’s railing encircled by three girls on a moped, a video camera and pounding music.

Driver [on his horn, congratulationary, looking intently through passenger window]: Teeet teeet tet tet teeet


Driver: Aih dah! El 3aroosa wa7shah gedddddddan. [Blimey! The bride is reallyyyy ugly!]

Ya saaater! [Bloody hell!]

Laih yabny keda?!? [Why'd you do it son?]

Asta3’for Allah el 3azeem. [May God forgive me]

Pause. Driver exits bridge onto Corniche.

Driver: La2 bass kaanet wa7sha fe3lan. [She really was ugly]

El masal y2olak aih: ‘Ya wa7’ed el 2erd 3ala maalo, yero7 el maal we yefdal el 2erd 3ala 7aalo.’ [As the saying goes: choose the monkey cos of his wealth and the wealth will go and you'll be left with the monkey]

Ya3ni law heya keda ba3d el coiffeer ommal 2ablaha sheklaha kaan 3amel ezzay? [If she looks like this after the hairdressers what did she look like before?]

3andina el 7areem wa7shah bass mesh keda ya rabby. [Where I'm from women are ugly but by God not like that]

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