Harrying the marrying

Amnesiac is in a taxi with associates on the October Bridge on a balmy, breezy night.

The moustachioed, bawdy taxi driver slows down as he passes a wedding in order to inspect the couple who are standing against the bridge’s railing encircled by three girls on a moped, a video camera and pounding music.

Driver [on his horn, congratulationary, looking intently through passenger window]: Teeet teeet tet tet teeet


Driver: Aih dah! El 3aroosa wa7shah gedddddddan. [Blimey! The bride is reallyyyy ugly!]

Ya saaater! [Bloody hell!]

Laih yabny keda?!? [Why'd you do it son?]

Asta3’for Allah el 3azeem. [May God forgive me]

Pause. Driver exits bridge onto Corniche.

Driver: La2 bass kaanet wa7sha fe3lan. [She really was ugly]

El masal y2olak aih: ‘Ya wa7’ed el 2erd 3ala maalo, yero7 el maal we yefdal el 2erd 3ala 7aalo.’ [As the saying goes: choose the monkey cos of his wealth and the wealth will go and you'll be left with the monkey]

Ya3ni law heya keda ba3d el coiffeer ommal 2ablaha sheklaha kaan 3amel ezzay? [If she looks like this after the hairdressers what did she look like before?]

3andina el 7areem wa7shah bass mesh keda ya rabby. [Where I'm from women are ugly but by God not like that]

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10 Responses to Harrying the marrying

  1. Arima says:

    lol! That’s quite a funny little monologue he had going there! Tho a bit cruel to the poor lady in question

  2. ramy says:

    matezlemoosh el foola el mesawesa, tela2y el kayal me3afen!

  3. Molly says:

    anyone with a mustache is not allowed to comment.

  4. Safiya Outlines says:

    Molly – Hush your mouth! Moustaches are a fine manly accoutrement and the decline of of society can be directly linked to the decline in moustache wearing.

  5. greyscale says:

    lool that saying about the monkey is hilarious!!

  6. Muhammad Aladdin says:

    .. وايه تعمل الماشطة ف الوش العكر
    (What would a brush do with a hideous face).. نسي دي هو

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  9. Having read this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you taking the time and effort to put this article together. I once again find myself spending way to much time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worth it!

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